Schuper Bowl Ad to Haunt People’s Thoughts

In an attempt to effectively advertise their new product, Schmountain Dew aired a disturbing commercial during the Schuper Bowl featuring an abomination of genetic engineering. Schmountain Dew spokespeople had the following comment:

“We were looking to embody the essence of our new product, which is the combination of 3 things. Se we looked to our scientists to create a living mascot for our product. Our CEO’s determined that fusing the three cutest parts of the 3 cutests things they could think of should go over well with the viewers and it would be named ‘Cliff’. Sadly, the combination of a cute puppy face, monkey’s body and baby’s bottom did not have the synergistic effect we were looking for.”

Viewers of the Schuper Bowl tweeted the following:

“There are some horrific images that you will never be able to un-see and will haunt your dreams. This is one of them.”

After airing of the commercial and seeing the public response to their newest ad campaign, ‘Cliff’ was promptly terminated as were the masterminds behind this atrocious crime against humanity.

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